Teemanumeromme tutustuttaa teidät niin nais- kuin miespuolisiin bimboihin, hidasälyisiin sekä salaa älykkäisiin. Mukana on myös tulevaisuuden kauhukuvia ja nykybimbouden pohtimista. Seitsemän taiteilijaa esittää oman näkemyksensä aiheesta, mukana niin nais- kuin miestekijöitä suomesta sekä yksi englannistakin.
Seuraavan teeman aiheena on Rajat. Sarjakuvia voi jo lähettää osoitteeseen nettinarttu@gmail.com
The Web bitches presents: The Bimbos. Comics are in English or they have English subtitles. Next issue is the limits. Send us your comics to nettinarttu@gmail.com
nartut
sisällys | index
2. Lissu Sjöholm 3.-6. Olli Hietala 7. Tuukka Teponoja 8.-11. Hanna-Anniina 12.-19. Veera Matilainen 20.-22. Tom Smith 23.-27. Ninni Aalto
Sarjakuvien käännökset | translation tekijät sekä Vanessa Sjörgen
Teemakuva | Theme image Veera Matilainen
02
Lissu Sjöholm
Some people call me a binbo 'cause I'm a little slow. | This is my pal Anna. She's just as dumb as me. | Am too. | Nobody calls Anna a bimbo 'cause she's so ugly. | They don't.
03
Olli Hietala
We used to have a toilet diary in the commune. It was a combined guest book and diary for the people living there. Sometimes arguments would get into the book too. | Olliii! I'm peeing in my pants soon! | I've got bigger business going than you needing to pee! | What are you writing, a book in there?! OUT! | I think it was the autumn of 2004 when I opened up about my sexuality in the toilet diary.
04
I'd just broken up from my girlfriend and the things I wrote were a big deal for me. | Toilet's free now. | Well thanks, but I peed in the shower already. | I made sure everyone living in the commune went to the bathroom. | Hei Erika! 6. Hi! | You need to pee? | Huh? | I couldn't wait for everyone to find out about my revelation. | Have some water, drink! | Huh? | I think Erika was the last who hadn't read it. | Ok, ok, I'm going, I'm going!
05
So how are you feeling? | Why did you want me to go pee? | And were you listening behind the door for my tinkle?! | No, wait! | No privacy in the whole place! | I guess Erika didn't take it too well. | She's so conservative. | Olli you perv! | Wait! | AAAH! Leave me alone for a minute! | No, you need to read this.
06
Why didn't you just say I needed to read the toilet diary? | Ooooh. | OOOOOH! | It's wonderful Olli! I finally have someone to shop with! | The next morning | Olli, Olli! Can we go shopping already? | Then we could read Cosmo and do each others hair for hours! | And then go clubbing!* | Got any coffee.... | In bimbo vision:
* = uh, in Tornio?
07
Tuukka Teponoja
Miten erottaa RAMBO BIMBOsta:
Rambolla on:
isot, muoviset, hyllyvät lisäkkeet | lepakonpaskaa aivoina | kampaus, joka näytti karseelta jo 80-luvulla | kaula, joka on yhtä paksu kuin 100 vuotias tammi | isot (teko)rinnat | kaiken mukamas hauskojen heittojen heikentämät jalat.
Bimbolla on:
lepakkokin jo lentänyt | aina muodin mukainen hiustyyli | kaulan sijaan käytetty hammastikku | isot, muoviset, hyllyvät lisäkkeet | isot (teko)rinnat | vahvat jalat rintaliiveittä portaissa juoksemisesta
08
Hanna-Anniina
why men want us to be bimbos? | Well... I don't know. -I don't really want them to. | Bimbo bitches give some more easily. | They are too stupid to keep up the appearance of purity. | Well, first of all, When you fuck a bimbo, it's fascinating to think that it's like subjugating. | And then, Bimbos like to be subjugated. | You'll score more easily, haha! | That was only Juha's band... Not all the guys think like that.
09
But I think they do think JUST like that. | don't know... | They do want to think that they're brighter than us. | But I'm not sure at all that it has anything to do with sex. | Come on, Anni, Think about it! How many things they have in their mind that have nothing to do with sex? | That's right! | Well...hmph! | But that's so stupid. I'm at my brightest when I feel like humping... | ..Then I can make some really sneaky plans, if I have to, to get some. | Anni, nobody said that guys are right. | They aren't.
10
Think about Eeva. You cannot find a chick more stupid than her. She is like the bimbo of the bimbos. | And still, she is also a frigid whore! | Haha! A frigid whore!? | Well, You know what I mean! | That's true! Maybe, if the guys want only pussy, they should look to another direction. | Like athletes! | That weightlifting girl in our class! | You mean Sanna? | Yeah, her! She is like a sex machine! | I saw her touching herself one time at the history class. | No way! I think she was only itching. | No, no, no! She was touching herself allright! The masturbating muscles in her hand were moving really fast. | Hahaha! | That's sick!
11
Sanna has only one problem. She is too ugly to get laid. | She must have taken hormones. | Yeah, definitely... That's why she's so in lust all the time. | I have to confess... | ...I have played that game with guys myself. With their rules! | When I was trying to pick up a guy, I've pretended that I'm more stupid than I am. | Yeah... I've read that a woman cons herself too when she wants to have sex. It has something to do with that evolution thing... | I think all of us have a little bimbo bitch inside of us. | But still, we are wiser than guys! | Of course we are!
12
Veera Matilainen
And she dared to ask my ex out.. | Poor you | So I asked--* Her ex and--* She was--* And I--* And she--*
13
What are you looking at? | You young men don't know anything about sorrow | (Why don't you--*) | Let me tell you a story | (we're girls, you know) | (my beer!) | This is a story that is more tragic and heartbreaking than anything that you young gentelmen have ever had the misfortune to hear. This is a story about a woman called... Bimbo.
14
I met her while I was fishing in Texas| (fucking meat-eater...) | (They have lakes there?) | Don't interrupt! It was the summer of -79 and I was young and handsome. /(as if, you where probably a dork) | (what about the Bimbo woman?) | Well, one night I went to a local dance...
15
She was a real small town princess... I fell in love instantly | oh brother....
16
She seemed to have admirers everywhere | and I wasn't any better | But one night I was walking past her home.
17
Is this going somewhere? | Young love... | I doubt it...
18
As is customary in Texas, we were married the same night | start | One night I was returning home..
19
Let me guess, Bimbo and Berta had run off. | how did you know? | Nobody can be that stupid | Let's go | But... | I'm a man!
20
Tom Smith
Hei Bimbo! | Mä tartten sun apua. |Mulla on tää algebran tehtävä ja se on siis ihan mahdoton | No älä multa kysy. Mä oon ihan täysi bimbo. | Ai niin. Mä siis täysin unohdin.
21
"Jos määrittelemme ikuisuuden tarkoittavan ajattomuutta loputtoman ajallisen jatkumisen sijaan, ikuinen elämä kuuluu niille, jotka elävät nykyhetkessä." | Hei Bimbo! | Näytät mietteliäältä. Mikä vaivaa? | Ai! Minä, siis.... Mietiskelin vain mitä kenkiä käyttää ensi torstaina. | Voi Bimbo!
22
Hei Bimbo! Me mennään ostarille hengaan. Tuutko messiin? | Sori... Mun pitää kirjoittaa loppuun mun väikkäri ilmastonmuutoksen ekonomisista seuraamuksista! | ... | Vitsi! | Voi Bimbo!
23
Ninni Aalto
I'm pretty sure that not all toys meant for little girls were shocking pink when I was a kid... | Definetely not all the clothes. | I must be getting old... It's getting harder to get rid of these 'what are the young getting to' thoughts.
24
And were do these come from? "It's important to get back in shape after child birth." "A man deserves a wife with a good body." "The husband suffers when his wife gains weight during pregnancy." | When did women regress to being owned by men again? | How can a grown person say things like this? | Miss Bimbo -net game?
25
What will people like that be like when they grow up? | There aren't enough hockey pros for them either... | You don't see bimbo grandma's all that often, do they grow up or die from complications in plastic surgery?
26
Lets cencor the internet and child pornography will disappear. | They're everywhere! | What now after a year of being a beauty pagent winner? | Modeling and tv hosting gigs... then my boyfriend will buy me some silicones... | I've been thinking of being a representative since I'm kinda like interested in that sort of things...
27
Although I suppose things could be worse. | Coming to Pekka's to see the match? | I'll bring the beer. | My mom's baking sausages. | Sorry. It's my turn to cook and I need to vacuum and clean the carpets first.
Teemanumeromme tutustuttaa teidät niin nais- kuin miespuolisiin bimboihin, hidasälyisiin sekä salaa älykkäisiin. Mukana on myös tulevaisuuden kauhukuvia ja nykybimbouden pohtimista. Seitsemän taiteilijaa esittää oman näkemyksensä aiheesta, mukana niin nais- kuin miestekijöitä suomesta sekä yksi englannistakin.
Seuraavan teeman aiheena on Rajat. Sarjakuvia voi jo lähettää osoitteeseen nettinarttu@gmail.com
The Web bitches presents: The Bimbos. Comics are in English or they have English subtitles. Next issue is the limits. Send us your comics to nettinarttu@gmail.com
nartut
sisällys | index
2. Lissu Sjöholm 3.-6. Olli Hietala 7. Tuukka Teponoja 8.-11. Hanna-Anniina 12.-19. Veera Matilainen 20.-22. Tom Smith 23.-27. Ninni Aalto
Sarjakuvien käännökset | translation tekijät sekä Vanessa Sjörgen
Teemakuva | Theme image Veera Matilainen
02
Lissu Sjöholm
Some people call me a binbo 'cause I'm a little slow. | This is my pal Anna. She's just as dumb as me. | Am too. | Nobody calls Anna a bimbo 'cause she's so ugly. | They don't.
03
Olli Hietala
We used to have a toilet diary in the commune. It was a combined guest book and diary for the people living there. Sometimes arguments would get into the book too. | Olliii! I'm peeing in my pants soon! | I've got bigger business going than you needing to pee! | What are you writing, a book in there?! OUT! | I think it was the autumn of 2004 when I opened up about my sexuality in the toilet diary.
04
I'd just broken up from my girlfriend and the things I wrote were a big deal for me. | Toilet's free now. | Well thanks, but I peed in the shower already. | I made sure everyone living in the commune went to the bathroom. | Hei Erika! 6. Hi! | You need to pee? | Huh? | I couldn't wait for everyone to find out about my revelation. | Have some water, drink! | Huh? | I think Erika was the last who hadn't read it. | Ok, ok, I'm going, I'm going!
05
So how are you feeling? | Why did you want me to go pee? | And were you listening behind the door for my tinkle?! | No, wait! | No privacy in the whole place! | I guess Erika didn't take it too well. | She's so conservative. | Olli you perv! | Wait! | AAAH! Leave me alone for a minute! | No, you need to read this.
06
Why didn't you just say I needed to read the toilet diary? | Ooooh. | OOOOOH! | It's wonderful Olli! I finally have someone to shop with! | The next morning | Olli, Olli! Can we go shopping already? | Then we could read Cosmo and do each others hair for hours! | And then go clubbing!* | Got any coffee.... | In bimbo vision:
* = uh, in Tornio?
07
Tuukka Teponoja
Miten erottaa RAMBO BIMBOsta:
Rambolla on:
isot, muoviset, hyllyvät lisäkkeet | lepakonpaskaa aivoina | kampaus, joka näytti karseelta jo 80-luvulla | kaula, joka on yhtä paksu kuin 100 vuotias tammi | isot (teko)rinnat | kaiken mukamas hauskojen heittojen heikentämät jalat.
Bimbolla on:
lepakkokin jo lentänyt | aina muodin mukainen hiustyyli | kaulan sijaan käytetty hammastikku | isot, muoviset, hyllyvät lisäkkeet | isot (teko)rinnat | vahvat jalat rintaliiveittä portaissa juoksemisesta
08
Hanna-Anniina
why men want us to be bimbos? | Well... I don't know. -I don't really want them to. | Bimbo bitches give some more easily. | They are too stupid to keep up the appearance of purity. | Well, first of all, When you fuck a bimbo, it's fascinating to think that it's like subjugating. | And then, Bimbos like to be subjugated. | You'll score more easily, haha! | That was only Juha's band... Not all the guys think like that.
09
But I think they do think JUST like that. | don't know... | They do want to think that they're brighter than us. | But I'm not sure at all that it has anything to do with sex. | Come on, Anni, Think about it! How many things they have in their mind that have nothing to do with sex? | That's right! | Well...hmph! | But that's so stupid. I'm at my brightest when I feel like humping... | ..Then I can make some really sneaky plans, if I have to, to get some. | Anni, nobody said that guys are right. | They aren't.
10
Think about Eeva. You cannot find a chick more stupid than her. She is like the bimbo of the bimbos. | And still, she is also a frigid whore! | Haha! A frigid whore!? | Well, You know what I mean! | That's true! Maybe, if the guys want only pussy, they should look to another direction. | Like athletes! | That weightlifting girl in our class! | You mean Sanna? | Yeah, her! She is like a sex machine! | I saw her touching herself one time at the history class. | No way! I think she was only itching. | No, no, no! She was touching herself allright! The masturbating muscles in her hand were moving really fast. | Hahaha! | That's sick!
11
Sanna has only one problem. She is too ugly to get laid. | She must have taken hormones. | Yeah, definitely... That's why she's so in lust all the time. | I have to confess... | ...I have played that game with guys myself. With their rules! | When I was trying to pick up a guy, I've pretended that I'm more stupid than I am. | Yeah... I've read that a woman cons herself too when she wants to have sex. It has something to do with that evolution thing... | I think all of us have a little bimbo bitch inside of us. | But still, we are wiser than guys! | Of course we are!
12
Veera Matilainen
And she dared to ask my ex out.. | Poor you | So I asked--* Her ex and--* She was--* And I--* And she--*
13
What are you looking at? | You young men don't know anything about sorrow | (Why don't you--*) | Let me tell you a story | (we're girls, you know) | (my beer!) | This is a story that is more tragic and heartbreaking than anything that you young gentelmen have ever had the misfortune to hear. This is a story about a woman called... Bimbo.
14
I met her while I was fishing in Texas| (fucking meat-eater...) | (They have lakes there?) | Don't interrupt! It was the summer of -79 and I was young and handsome. /(as if, you where probably a dork) | (what about the Bimbo woman?) | Well, one night I went to a local dance...
15
She was a real small town princess... I fell in love instantly | oh brother....
16
She seemed to have admirers everywhere | and I wasn't any better | But one night I was walking past her home.
17
Is this going somewhere? | Young love... | I doubt it...
18
As is customary in Texas, we were married the same night | start | One night I was returning home..
19
Let me guess, Bimbo and Berta had run off. | how did you know? | Nobody can be that stupid | Let's go | But... | I'm a man!
20
Tom Smith
Hei Bimbo! | Mä tartten sun apua. |Mulla on tää algebran tehtävä ja se on siis ihan mahdoton | No älä multa kysy. Mä oon ihan täysi bimbo. | Ai niin. Mä siis täysin unohdin.
21
"Jos määrittelemme ikuisuuden tarkoittavan ajattomuutta loputtoman ajallisen jatkumisen sijaan, ikuinen elämä kuuluu niille, jotka elävät nykyhetkessä." | Hei Bimbo! | Näytät mietteliäältä. Mikä vaivaa? | Ai! Minä, siis.... Mietiskelin vain mitä kenkiä käyttää ensi torstaina. | Voi Bimbo!
22
Hei Bimbo! Me mennään ostarille hengaan. Tuutko messiin? | Sori... Mun pitää kirjoittaa loppuun mun väikkäri ilmastonmuutoksen ekonomisista seuraamuksista! | ... | Vitsi! | Voi Bimbo!
23
Ninni Aalto
I'm pretty sure that not all toys meant for little girls were shocking pink when I was a kid... | Definetely not all the clothes. | I must be getting old... It's getting harder to get rid of these 'what are the young getting to' thoughts.
24
And were do these come from? "It's important to get back in shape after child birth." "A man deserves a wife with a good body." "The husband suffers when his wife gains weight during pregnancy." | When did women regress to being owned by men again? | How can a grown person say things like this? | Miss Bimbo -net game?
25
What will people like that be like when they grow up? | There aren't enough hockey pros for them either... | You don't see bimbo grandma's all that often, do they grow up or die from complications in plastic surgery?
26
Lets cencor the internet and child pornography will disappear. | They're everywhere! | What now after a year of being a beauty pagent winner? | Modeling and tv hosting gigs... then my boyfriend will buy me some silicones... | I've been thinking of being a representative since I'm kinda like interested in that sort of things...
27
Although I suppose things could be worse. | Coming to Pekka's to see the match? | I'll bring the beer. | My mom's baking sausages. | Sorry. It's my turn to cook and I need to vacuum and clean the carpets first.
Some people call me a binbo 'cause I'm a little slow. | This is my pal Anna. She's just as dumb as me. | Am too. | Nobody calls Anna a bimbo 'cause she's so ugly. | They don't.
